Did you hear about the mathematician who's afraid of negative numbers?
He'll stop at nothing to avoid them.
Who is the saddest person at McDonald's®?
What did the pen say to the pencil?
What's a villain's favorite Thanksgiving tradition?
What do monkeys wear when they are cooking?
Why did the tomato turn red?
Why are fish so good at watching their weight?
Why don't oysters share their pearls?
Why is a computer so smart?
Why can't Christmas trees sew?
What day do hands always go to church?
Which animal is the leader of the mafia?
What kind of bird is always on pitch in choir?
Which celebrity shines the brightest?
Why did the broom get a poor grade in school?
Why did the scientist hang the periodic table posters?
What do basketball players and lawyers have in common?
What is a pilot's favorite TV show?
How do bees get to school?
What's the opposite of irony?
What did the mother ghost tell the baby ghost when he ate his ice cream too fast?