My New Year's resolution is to stop procrastinating.
But I will wait until tomorrow to start.
What do eggs say after a long day at work?
What did the sickly elevator say?
Who is the saddest person at McDonald's®?
What do you call a cow that can't moo?
What do you call a basketball player with a drooling problem?
What's a pig's favorite way to get to work?
How do you know if a cow is having a rough day?
Did you hear about the restaurant on the moon?
What did Papa John name his newborn son?
Which musician loves to make chili?
Do you have a date for Valentine's Day?
Why do bananas need to use sunscreen on their summer vacations?
How does the moon cut her hair?
What do actors and people who leave voicemails have in common?
Why did Dr. Frankenstein invite his monster over for dinner?
What's a bog's favorite sweet treat?
What do you say to Simba when he's moving too slowly?
What's James Bond's favorite hot drink?
What's the difference between a pickpocket and an umpire?
Why did the witch's team lose the baseball game?