What does one secret agent cow say to another secret agent cow before a mission?

18 Udderly Hilarious Cow Jokes

By Ashley S. • Jan 30, 2024

Moo-ve over other animals, cow jokes are king! And you butter believe we're milking them for all they're worth. We're udderly blown away with just how much you love them, so we created a list of 18 Udderly Hilarious Cow Jokes to keep you laughing until the cows come home!

1. Why do archers make great cow optometrists?

Why do archers make great cow optometrists? image

They know all about bullseyes.

2. What did the man say when the calf attended church?

What did the man say when the calf attended church? image

Holy cow!

3. Why do cows go to New York?

Why do cows go to New York? image

To see the moo-sicals.

4. How do you make a cow float?

How do you make a cow float? image

Root beer, ice cream, a cherry, and a cow.

5. Why do farmers avoid buying skinny cows?

Why do farmers never want to buy skinny cows? image

They only produce non-fat milk.

6. What did the farmer say when his cows escaped?

What did the farmer say when his cows escaped? image

That barn door!

7. What do you call a cow that can play a musical instrument?

What do you call a cow that can play a musical instrument? image

A moo-sician.

8. What is it called when a cow accidentally burns itself?

What is it called when a cow accidentally burns itself? image

Roast beef.

9. What do you call a cow that can't moo?

What do you call a cow that can't moo? image

A milk dud.

10. Why do cows have hooves instead of feet?

Why do cows have hooves instead of feet? image

Because they lactose.

11. Why was the cow afraid?

Why was the cow afraid? image

He was a cow-herd.

12. What sound do you hear when a cow breaks the sound barrier?

What sound do you hear when a cow breaks the sound barrier? image

Cowboom!

13. Why are cows bad at telling jokes?

Why are cows bad at telling jokes? image

They milk the punchlines.

14. What do you call a cow with a twitch?

What do you call a cow with a twitch? image

Beef jerky.

15. How does a cow do math?

How does a cow do math? image

With a cow-culator.

16. Where do cows go for lunch?

Where do cows go for lunch? image

The calf-eteria.

17. Why is it hard to talk to a shy cow?

Why is it hard to talk to a shy cow? image

Because they won't udder a word.

18. What do you call a cow that eats your grass?

What do you call a cow that eats your grass? image

A lawn moo-er.

We hope this list of laughs has given you some moo-mentum to break away from the herd and enjoy the rest of your day!

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